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Tuesday, March 04, 2008

halos peeps.. wonder who still reads my blog..
been more than 1 month since i updated.. haha i sincerely apologize..
been having exams..
and i realise i really miss my frens.. esp those whom i do not get to see so often..

we celebrated bra's bday yesterday.. great to see him happy! its good that we're finally doing sth for him, cos its always been v slipshod when it comes to his bday.. haha.. gave him an optimus prime! (is tt how u spell it haha)

its finally our one week break now! hooray! and blur me actually thought it was going to be three weeks. wad a let down. but owells at least we get a break.. i think i am so not going to be used to the "clinical" life.. waking up early, rounds, getting home late, having to study after getting home.. kinda got accustomed to studying for exams everyday haha..

but its kinda great this time round, cos.. there's a new found sense of peace and stressless-ness as i study for exams this time.. and i really have to thank God for that, because i know He has a plan for me. :)

had grand plans to really make full use of everyday of the break, but i feel so tired when i wake up everyday that i just wanna nua at home.. but when i nua at home i feel so bad, because i am just wasting my precious break away.. but i carn think of anything exciting and cheap to do that's the problem.. dunno who to go out with too.. haha.. maybe im just making excuses cos im too lazy to think of anything. i wish i can just teleport myself. i'm so full of contradiction. im just too lazy for my own good!

hope jess is getting on fine. well, at least she's learning how to cook, while im learning how to be a better complainer. talking about complaining.. it just reminds me of wad happened yesterday at coffee club.. ah traumatic, but nvm, live and let live. jia you jess.. i miss u here!
and i miss mich too.. hope her lab stuff is getting on fine....!
and i miss hp too.... dunno how her classes are.... graduating soon lo!
and i miss my b... i want to meet her! and everyone else too!

i want to plan for my electives. i want to plan for my june hols. but i am such a bad planner. i have no motivation to plan for anything! how bad is it? sigh sigh.

and i absolutely hate the vibes at home now. cummon parents. please grow up. how do u expect me to hold intellectual conversations with you when all you do is cry and act all fragile and vulnerable and give me irrelevant replies which do not answer the questions i have? how do u expect me to discuss things with you when i know you will get all emotional and fired up and then make life hell for me at home? all i wish is to have a decent conversation. one where all of us can sit there, calm and level-headed, all of us speaking politely, no jibes, no sarcasm, no hidden daggers.. using logic to reason, and not generalizing, stereotyping, using spite to get your way. please show me that you have the intellectual capacity to use logic and reason to convince me, and even if i am ultimately not convinced, please act your age and not show a black face or launch the second cold war. please do not put words into my mouth, please do not use this one incident to discount all the previous good things which i have done. please, all i really want to do is to talk to you properly. but what really hurts me is knowing that i probably will never be able to do that. is this what your religion is teaching you to do? are you really following what your religion wants you to do? there is no point kow-towing and donating money, and then behaving this way. i have so much more to say, but there is seriously no point. i really hope one day you guys will see some light. maybe then, we will finally be able to have a decent conversation.

__pondering* 11:06 AM :)