Friday, June 10, 2005
the channel u talkshow "shoot" had an interesting topic today.. "is singapore a boring place?".. hasn't that been something i've been complaining about for years? you know, some things just can't be explained in words.. singapore is boring in a sense that can't be described in words.. but i guess life is generally quite boring unless you have a burning passion for something.. like pong and squash, some girls and guys and clubbing, some muggers and studying, some people and saving the world.. for mediocre people like me with mediocre interest and mediocre zest for activities around me, life just never gets interesting enough, or for long enough. i mean.. shopping.. no $$.. read? dunno wad to read.. can't read all day long either.. explore singapore.. who to explore with me? go overseas.. no moo-nay.. eat.. i'm fat enough.. sports.. who to sport with? great singapore sale? too fat, can't fit into the clothes on offer. arts festival? prices are so ex i can't afford to splurge.. seriously, what can you do in singapore? on a more serious note, what can you do without money? and on the most serious note, what can you do without company?
as i've come to realise more and more, nobody's perfect. and nobody's life's perfect, no matter how it seems to be on the surface. however i have to add that some people's lives are more perfect than the rest. but perhaps with unseen consequences and repercussions that will unravel only with time..
studying again is scary.. i wonder if my brain can take all that cramming and vacuum packing of facts again. i wonder if i'll make good frens in med fac..or in NUS for that matter..
i just love to blog. its so much easier to express my thoughts and feelings in writing than in verbal form. blogging allows me to reflect and process things.. put things in order, mull over them, tie up the loose ends, try to make things organized and de-abstractify feelings before i expel them into physical existence. i love blogging cos it gives me control over what i want to say. i can take all the time in the world to think about what to say, to mean what i say. i don't have to worry about how to continue the conversation.. don't have to be paisei that i take so long to process my thoughts into words.. don't have to worry about having nothing to say. i can verbalize things alright, but sometimes, i just can't. all i can say is that i'm a slow thinker.
feeling very "rebuttive" today.. itching for a quarrel. haha.. but thankfully the day will pass in another hour's time.
i find that i talk a lot about feelings on my blog. nvm, that's totally out of point.
don't try too hard.
