Wednesday, March 16, 2005
well, i just realised that jen is working at cleo! haha! how fun! and she interviewed nita and wingyee for some questions.. how so very fun! :) yeap, devoured my second half of cleo hungrily.. i love tabloids nowadays.. bumming around is really bad for health.. the article that left an impression on me was the one titled "getting the message".. something about how guys and gals view technology and communication differently.. here goes..
"It was driving me crazy," he says, "and we came close to breaking up. There's no easy way to phrase, "honey i love you, but could you just leave me alone for a while." Second only to the frequency, what got to me big time was the reasons for her calls were non-existent: Just to say hello, what are you having for lunch and so on."
Here's the problem: Women tend to believe that as long as they are talking, everything is fine and the bonds with each are being subtly reinforced through every interaction. Men, on the other hairy (haha) hand, subscribe to the simple philosophy that you only have to talk when something's the matter and there's a matter to be solved. Other than that, there is literally an unspoken agreement that life is dandy and it's understood that he loves you and you love him.
We(men) view these innovations(techno gadgets) as mere tools for accessing, assimilating and information. Emotion-free where possible, which is why we don't tend to go for these :-) or these:!!!
Well, who understands the psychology of men? i can't help but feel that there are indeed masculine creatures who long to have chatty phone calls with their friends, but who are afraid to do so because they fear how their male counterparts will view them.. but yeah, i'm really quite amused and amazed at how guys can pass their days whizzing in and around their virtual world.. is it really that interesting?
i've had first-hand experiences of the "male" version of communicating.. i don't get messages like "hi! just popping by to say hello!" or anything like that from guys.. mostly from girls.. your bf probably wun sms or call u for nothing too (that is if he knows you won't get angry..haha) .. i thereby conclude that guys won't sms u for nothing unless they are trying to woo you.. haha.. a little biased, but i find some traces of truth in my hypothesis. My guy friends sound cold and aloof in their messages.. it's a cold "full-stop" or simple few word answers that are just direct replies to your questions. makes me wonder if i'm too chatty or sound too happy in my messages sometimes. haha..
in some ways, i feel like a girl, in others, i feel like a guy. ok, i long for someone whom i can chat to about nothing at all.. just to call up when i am bored, hang out, chill out together.. do stupid crazy things.. like what jess mich and jam do.. but at the same time, you can't talk too much too. sigh, i guess everything's about striking a balance.
don't waste your time asking if it bothers him that you contact him a few times a day: He'll say no for fear of hurting your feelings. Instead, taper off the contact until you're working on no more than a single call per medium - email, SMS, cell phone- per day. Better still, hang such communication around a piece of information, like the questions you need answered or details of where to meet later.
is that really what guys want? or is david smiedt just speaking for a minority of the guys? i have no idea.. haha.. ok, i shall resolve not to send more than 5 smses a day then. haha..
a leech like me needs a new victim.
